I'm starting a new blog to chronicle my two years with Teach for America in Chicago. I'll start at the begninning in this post. Be warned- it's a doozy.
The Decision
The whole process began last fall. The program staggers their application process to have four deadlines. I was taking the LSAT the day before the first deadline, so I applied during the second round, submitting my first application November 5, 2006. I had a phone interview about a week later, submitted my second round of paperwork December 1, and had my final interview December 4. The final interview is a day long process. You get assigned a group (there were 9 people in mine) and the day starts with each of you giving a prepared, 5-minute lesson to the group and the two interviewers. Mine was about the difference between a fact and an opinion. It went horribly, and I was fairly certain after it was over that I had botched the whole opportunity and would never be picked. After the lesson plans we had a group activity and then an individual "critical thinking" exercise. Then we signed up for individual interview times. It was about noon and mine was at 3, so I went home. I cried, felt sorry for myself, and had lunch. The interview went really well and renewed my hopes.
Less than two weeks after that, I got a phone call and an e-mail telling me the box with my materials (letter of recommendation and a few other forms I had turned in at the interview) had been lost in transit to New York. They claimed they didn't need the letter of rec. because it had already been reviewed, and the person on the phone said something like "if you want to receive your placement by the january 8 deadline, please send in your materials as soon as possible." This was reassuring, but not confirmation that I had already been picked. It was an anxious Christmas, especially because well meaning family members kept inquiring about my post-graduation plans and I hate telling people things that aren't certain. "Well, I APPLIED for Teach for America, but really who knows... that or law school?" I had been accepted to Duke at that point, and got my acceptance from GWU right around the new year. But really I spent all of winter break counting down the days until my tfa deceision.
Sure enough, on Janurary 8 I opened my e-mail to see a congratulatory message from teachforamerica.com. I squealed a bit, logged in to the site, thrilled, and found that I had been assigned to Chicago- my first choice!--to teach high school Spanish-- the LAST thing I wanted to teach. my whole body sank. I called my mom, as promised, and a few other people, trying desperately to sort through the conflict I had before me.
In spite of my now ten years of Spanish training, including a semester living in Spain, I really don't consider myself fluent at all. And I certainly did not feel comfortable enough with the language to think I could teach other people to speak it. I have lots of experience with elementary aged kids and had pictured myself all along in the 3rd-5th grade range, though I flirted with the idea of pre-k. I had preferenced accordingly, listing high school as my last choice and assuming I would get an elementary placement because I didn't major in one of teh traditional high school subjects and so didn't have the coursework necessary to teach secondary ed. That third major snuck up on me....
I talked with a lot of people over the next few days- family, friends, TFA people. Anyone who would listen, really. Just as I had convinced myself that I could be a wonderful creative, effective Spanish teacher, I got a complicating surprise. That Saturday I found a small envelope from GWU Law in my mailbox. "Dear Ms. Geraghty. We'd like to offer you full tuition for three years ($38,000 x 3), free first year housing in a swanky highrise in D.C., and a faculty mentor. Let us know by April 16." I was, quite literally, floored. I quickly stood back up from my spot on the tile to jump up and down and turn myself around aimlessly, looking for an explanation in the items in my apartment. I then had to sit back down as it dawned on me that such an offer would not likely be one that I could ask them to put on hold just for Princess Bridget. I made teh standard contacts to share the news and started what would be two weeks of not much sleep.
Teach for America had a relatively short deadline and I had 14 days to decide. I called GWU Monday just to double check that I couldn't defer the scholarship (I couldn't), but was reassured to hear the Dean's praise for Teach for America as a program. I talked to who knows how many people in Teach for America... Each person I talked with had three others who had deferred law school, or taught Spanish, or were teaching in Chicago, or were alums of U of I, or had red hair (kidding). It's a pretty amazing network of really wonderful people. That's not to say that GWU isn't- I contacted a few of their students and they were perfectly helpful and friendly. But there was really only one reason not to do TFA. Admittedly, it was large. But it was only one.
The night before the decision was due, I matriculated and submitted my "Reasons for Joining:"
"I have wanted to join Teach For America since I first heard about it several years ago. Since then, every time I've heard more information about it, my conviction has grown stronger and my affection for the program and its mission deeper. And yet I am here less than 48 hours from the decision deadline only just now submitting my acceptance.
Within a week, I received both my Teach for America placement and a non-deferrable scholarship offer from a top twenty law school worth nearly $130,000. And so I faced a moral dilemma: is it possible to place a value on the impact I could make in two years on the lives of children who have been consistently let down by the nation that promises them opportunity? Could graduating from law school debt free to enter a public interest position take the place of whatever service I could provide in the next two years as a teacher?
In the last two weeks I have slept little, thought much, and reached out to many. And my decision is ultimately based on the belief that everything else will fall into place if we follow our hearts and do the right thing. My belief in the power of education and my zeal for social justice are clear indicators to me that my decision to join is the right thing. For whatever good I may do someday as a lawyer, nothing can match the value of directly impacting, narrowing, or eliminating the achievement gap for even a single child."
I know it's cheesy. I was emotional. Give me that. But while that moment was emotional, the decision was not superficially considered. That statement is the truth, dressed in emotion and a bit of TFA lingo I picked up. I was ultimately more sure that doing Teach for America was right for me than I was sure that law school was where I wanted to be. That's not to say I don't actually want to go to law school. I may be the only person to have read One L and found myself excited rather than terrified. But those niggling doubts weren't going away. And I HAVE believed in TFA since I first heard about it. I still do. I knew I would always wonder about it later if I didn't do it now. What is it to be young if you can't take risks? While I'd like to believe this kind of idealism will last forever, there's no guarantee. Let me tell you, it's mighty powerful right now and I can do great things with so much strength. it was also nice to finaly have a definitive answer t the constant "what are you doing in May?" question.
I find it interesting that no matter what choice I had made, I would have finally lived in the same city as a sibling after 7 years of separate states. Maybe that's fate telling me either choice would have worked out. Or maybe it was just all three of us getting fed up and saying "Self, we need to get out of these backwoods and into a real city."
